Admission
- – Read it to me
please.
- – Yes, of course. –
and the angel began to read.
“Woman. Age 37. Long, black hair. No children. No family.
Cause of death: Drowned in the pool behind her home.”
- – You forgot to mention the name. I can’t type the report if I don’t have the name.
- – Yes, ma’am. I
apologize.
She nodded her head in
acceptance and the new angel began to read the full name listed on the
admittance form.
When she heard her own name being
read aloud, the woman, still wet and cold, realized that they had been speaking
about her. Confused and scared, she began to think – “drowned?” She looked at
her aqua green dress, wet and dirty, then looked around and realized that she
didn’t know where she was.
The light had temporarily blinded her for the first
few moments of consciousness in this strange place.
She couldn’t really see
anything.
Everything seemed to be made
of pure light.
The walls were so bright that
they barely seemed present. She began to realize that, although she was
sitting, she couldn’t actually feel the chair beneath her, nor distinguish its
shape.
The two continued to speak
behind her, behind the imperceptible wall. She closed her eyes, tired of
observing the unobservable, and began to listen to them speak. Their voices
were soft and clear, but…
“Drowned.”
“Drowned.”
“Drowned.”
was all she could hear.
How could I have drowned? I am
a terrific swimmer! I won many championships in my career! How? But how…?
Suddenly and violently, the
memory invaded her mind, and she remembered.
The night was cold and miserable, and she had been
alone in her home as usual. In an instant, before she herself could realize it,
she was already in the water.
She didn’t leave a note; there was no one to read it.
She didn’t call for any help; the decision was
definitive.
She was carrying a heavy stone from her lawn in her
arms and slowly she walked toward the deep end of the pool. Each step made with
conviction and without any doubt.
The only moment that she doubted her decision, was
when her own lungs provoked an instinctive reaction of survival in her body.
But she was calm, so tranquil that in her final
moments of consciousness, in the complete silence, she watched the grace and elegance
of the air bubbles escaping from her mouth. There was so much beauty in the
trapped air, with their refractive colors and perfect symmetry, that, just like
the overwhelming beauty that surrounded her in the world, she lost the will to
live in a world with such unbearable perfection and no one to share it with.
- – We cannot admit
her at this time.
She returned to
the present,
an un-present, present.
- – Tell her the
outcome. Take her to her room, and tell her to try to rest in peace, the wait
is an eternity.
